Mr. Sollemn, the man of the house, detests all unnecessary noises. Coming home from a fatiguing day at the office he sinks wearily into a chair and prepares to beguile away the evening hours by reading his daily paper. No sooner is he comfortable seated when his daughter Jane seats herself at the piano and begins to pound out some ragtime, and Willie, the small boy, starts the blaring phonograph. Sollemn cannot stand it, and in disgust he leaves the room and starts for the dining room. No sooner is he seated when he is again disturbed by the shrill voice of his mother-in-law’s pet parrot. Maddened to a great degree he seizes the offending bird by the neck and swings it around his head, hoping thereby to stop its noise. That noise is stopped temporarily, but no sooner is his grasp relinquished upon the bird when in comes Willie with a rattle and in a very enthusiastic manner proceeds to demonstrate the noisy contrivance. Sollemn takes the kid and gives him a good spanking. Poor Sollemn going from room to room in search of peace and quiet, but being unable to find it, decides that he will go to bed. In the quiet of his chamber he finds it almost impossible to sleep for the thump-thump of the boys’ punching bag, the rattle of the coal going down the chute, the clash and smash issuing from the department of cookery, etc. But finally dropping into an uneasy doze he is suddenly awakened by a strange noise. Investigating he finds there are burglars in the house, and upon going down to intercept the burglars he forms an idea, and the idea is to have the burglars take all the noise contrivances away This he makes the burglars do at the point of a revolver and after this duty is attended to he goes to bed.