Cons & Pros follows the story of two con artist women inspired by 2019’s media scam darlings Anna Delvey and Caroline Calloway. In order to pull off our con movie, we had to pull off a con ourselves: a piece of Heist Cinema, made by four people on a near zero dollar budget. To make the film we staged a marriage proposal at a luxury Toronto hotel and had our director/cinematographer pose as an “engagement videographer.” Costumes were rented and returned from Saks Fifth Ave, and all props/art were courtesy of rich & generous (and lightly duped) strangers. The film was an exercise in how the process affects the product, whilst also exploring what we feel is our duty as millennial artists living on the outskirts of the oppressive Neoliberal torture factory. Cons & Pros is a big middle finger to the capitalist regime’s promise of a luxury life that will never be ours. Making this film meant taking it without asking, and showing no mercy. VICE MAGAZINE covered the film, google it to read about the major heist. Below is a timeline of how the day progressed. Saturday 2:00PM - Book a suite at a five star luxury hotel in Toronto. Tell the customer rep it’s for a special occasion. You will be proposing to your girlfriend on Sunday night. You’re so nervous, but excited! After all, it’s where you met. Lay it on thick. You’re a con artist now. Lean in. Saturday 3:00PM - Review heist cinema tactical plans extensively. If you’re going to successfully make a film in a location that would otherwise cost hundreds of thousands of dollars, the blueprints need to be airtight. Sunday 10:00AM - Meet your costar at a downtown luxury department store. Be sure to wear something that makes you look expensive. Head to the 4th floor: womens designer. KEEP THOSE RECEIPTS. Everything is going back tomorrow. Sunday 12:00PM - No makeup artist? No problem. Walk your ass to Sephora. Hot tip, they will give you 15 minute mini makeovers for free. Book two appointments under different names so you have time to get your full face done. Buy at least one expensive skincare product as penance. You’re heisting, but we want this art endeavour to be sitting in the chaotic good quatrain of the alignment chart, and staying moisturized during a scam is critical. Sunday 5:00PM - Meet your director/cinematographer J at the hotel. For the evening, J will be playing your engagement videographer.* Ride the elevator to the VIP check in. The hot girls at the check in are excited for you. There’s a note on the file about the engagement, would you like a complimentary bottle of champagne sent to the room later? You bet your ass you would. Sunday 7:30PM - Head down to the retrofitted masterpiece lobby bar with your director. Acquire prime seating. Order a martini. Charm the fuck out of the bartender, but be cool about it. Less is more. Let him in on the secret (the proposal, NOT the film.) Let him know your “engagement videographer” will be filming the proposal, don’t say on what. He will assume an iPhone. The bartender discreetly lets the staff know. Everyone is onboard. Make sure no one sees the lav pack hanging off the back of your pants. Sunday 7:45PM - Co-star aka “girlfriend” arrives at the bar. Your director is already getting godly establishing shots and b-roll that would cost a small fortune. Scam on ladies, scam on. Text your director who is hiding on the upper decks of the bar…..”u got frame?” J does. It’s go time. Sunday 8:00PM - The proposal. The bar falls into a hush. Big kiss. Everyone claps. A beautiful couple at the bar buys you an obscenely expensive bottle of champagne. The house cracks some mid-market Moet. You get it all on camera. Sunday 8:30PM - Be magnanimous, share the bubbles with everyone. You still have half a movie to film. Ask the bartender if you can take the 2008 vintage Dom Perignon bottle, “for the memories.” It will make great set deck later. Sunday 9:00PM - Head back up to your luxury suite. Steal as much footage as you can in this aesthetic haven. No one cares. In fact, the staff is delighted that you’re there, “in love,” and recently “engaged.” Sunday 9:30PM - Begin filming the second half of your movie, conveniently localized to your suite. Worried about security wondering why the engagement videographer and some random dude (the boom operator) are spending the whole night in the suite of a couple who just got engaged? Doesn’t fucking matter boys. At five star hotels, discretion is the name of the game, and who knows what weird sex stuff you could theoretically be up. Sunday 10:0PM - Avail yourself to the free coffee mate, compliments of the house. This will be doubling at pretend cocaine in your movie. Its name brand powdered lactose baby. Monday 2:00AM - Order Mcdonalds. Hot & ready baby. Monday 5:00AM - WRAP. Finish the champagne and chocolate strawberries concierge sent up. Monday 9:00AM - Flush all the dime bags of pretend movie cocaine (lactose powder) down the toilet. I’ve never felt so goddamn rich and so goddamn poor in all my life. Monday 10:30AM - Head up the VIP lounge for your breakfast. Make sure your costar wears her ring. One of the hot girls from concierge is there. She’s excited and says the ring is beautiful. Ladies, it’s from Ardenes. Monday 11:00AM Check out. Throw all that equipment in an uber and get the hell out of there. Monday 11:01AM - Tell your uber driver there will be three drops offs. The heist is over Condarella. You’re a poor artist again. You can watch Cons & Pros here. It’s about two female grifter party girls caught up in a life of heist. So yes, it’s a con within a con. Very meta (ugh). You’ll love it. This movie was made by four people (J Steven, Karen Knox, Gwenlyn Cumyn, and Michael Schram). Two people worked on post production. The end. The Score (aka what we heisted)
-One day of shooting in a luxury hotel: $20,000
-50 extras: $10,000
-Wardrobe from Luxury Department Store, bought & returned: $1546.87
-Make up artist day rate: $250 + $50 kit fee
-Bottle of Dom Perignon Prestige cuvee 2008 ($800 from the lovely couple), bottle of Moet and two vodka martinis ($115 on the house from the bar), room service bottle of champagne and macarons ($95 compliments of the hotel)
Insurance general liability under 2 mill (the minimum requirement for film companies working in locations of this nature) $3500 Total: $36,356